After a while I realized it was just my IQ slowly dropping. Frostbite is one of those pathetic movies where no one, and I mean no one, is even trying. I rooted for the dorky hero to die inside that trashcan (how did he even manage to fit in there, anyway?),Traci Lords, the queen of B movies, was horribly unfunny and ripped me and my friends off by not showing her boobs a single time.
The "characters", though I use that term loosely, are people so exaggerated and one-dimensional they might as well have used cardboard cutouts. The "jokes" (I use this term loosely as well) are simply hilarious. A guy's fart causes an earthquake. Roflcopter! Our "hero" gets a butt acupuncture by Traci Lords. Oh God, I can't breathe! The blind guy uses the F word repeatedly! This is too much!!!
Say what you want about the acting but I thought Adam Grimes did a pretty good job at playing a mentally challenged snowboarder. Apart from that the sole source of entertainment value here is boobs. I think I counted three, maybe four pairs throughout the entire film, scattered over maybe five minutes of screen time. That's five minutes worth watching out of 83 minutes of unfunny trash. Don't watch this. Watch Barb Wire with Pamela Anderson - at least there was plenty of nudity and action in that trashy flick!(r#26)
Plot summary
Slacker Billy Wagstaff leaves his Venice Beach home and travels to Pine Mountain after being accepted into a snowboarding academy. Upon arriving, Billy and his childhood friend Casey land in the middle of a local feud between the egotistical mountain owner Colonel Jaffe, and the misfit locals led by activist J.P. Millhouse and coffee shop owner Naomi Bucks. Billy sets his signs on snowboarding, but when he's booted from the academy he teams up with the so-called "poories" to get even with Colonel Jaffe's group of "richies."
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This movie gave me an unsettling, sinking feeling.
Yes, it DOES suck as bad as they say.
Most of the time i don't agree with IMDb users rating. We don't have the same rating i guess, personally a 6 for me is a boring movie with few redeeming quality when a 8 is a good movie but thats it. To go under 6 the movie need to really be horrible. And here we got it... I do love brainless comedy American Pie style, and when reading the back cover it says American Pie meat Animal House. I never saw animal house, but i can say that this have nothing to do with American Pie. Sure AP had some over the top sequence, but overall the story was fun, the gag made you laugh a lot and you could feel for the characters.
Here all i was saying when watching this was "WTF is that?" its so stupid its not even funny. Its almost like watching a Scary Movie except in that case you know what you sign on, here you think you will just get a funny teen over the top comedy, but there is so far you can go "over the top" if i can say so...
The only redeeming quality of this would be some nice snowboarding tricks(but there is not very much of them) and a few boobies of playmate girls. But like somebody said before, rent a porn movie and you will get way more nudity and even a better story.
I said it a couple times, but having all characters be a total bad caricature is not gonna work, you can have 1 or 2 sure, but they need to have something special, it worked in harold and kumar, but this was well input. Anyway ill finish on this, glad i didn't paid much for this and save yourself a few bucks, buy a coffee, a muffin or whatever, you will spend your money a better way...
how to NOT make a comedy
What makes this movie so damn bad? Is it the lame sub-par juvenile humor? Could it be the horrid "trendy" suck ass music? Perhaps the uninspired go nowhere story? Or maybe even the fact that Traci Lords gives her worst acting performance ever and to add insult to injury keeps all her clothes on throughout the length of this steaming turd sandwich. Regardless no matter what the reason this film sucks, the fact remains that it really REALLY does. I have never wished I could be watching a movie with Dean Cameron in it instead of what I was watching in my life, but "Ski School" is a masterpiece of comic genius compared to this travesty.
My Grade: F
Eye Candy: Nikol Nesbitt, Buffy Tyler and Suzanne Stokes all unleash their Tupperware tits
Where I saw it: Starz on Demand