Want a movie with no action at all? Here it is, another Bill Rebane (Monster-a-go-go, Giant Spider Invasion),schlock-fest, boring beyond the limits of human tolerance. I'm a big fan of "so-bad-they're good" movies, since they are at least enjoyable on the level of invoking laughter from the unintentional humor; however, this one does not even achieve enjoyable camp status. It just annoys you.

Any "action" in this movie occurs off screen, and is conveyed through non-stop dialog throughout this tedious sleep-inducing dud. People blab on radios, aliens (with booming voices) chit-chat on radios, characters drone on endlessly to each other (without saying much),and on and on it goes. The most "exciting" sequence involved some colorful smoke bombs, with people screaming and running (away from the smoke?). Also, there's a plague (again, we only are told this through the babbling characters). Oh, and there's some irritating, synthesized noises in the soundtrack to tell you that something happens (since it doesn't happen on the screen, like it would in other movies).

There's plenty of ridiculous dialog; here's a sample: when a know-it-all guy theorizes (ready?) that Mars and the Earth were once closer to each other than the Earth and the moon are. The planets were aligned this way for over two thousand years, he lectures. How the five planetary bodies (Earth, its moon, Mars, and its two moons) did not crash into one another due to the immense, mutual gravitation, was not explained in the lecture.

That's about all there is to this, except a bizarre ending reminiscent of another Rebane fiasco, Monster-a-go-go. I don't know if MST3K ever slammed this one; they certainly should have. Even their best salvos might not have saved it, however. This mess deserves a negative rating, but, as you know, IMDb's rules prohibit that; which, in the case of this movie, is a pity.

INVASION FROM INNER EARTH is a low budget US science fiction flick with a great title and premise: a group of folks are trapped in a mountain cabin by aliens and wait for the impending end of the world. Sadly, it was made as an indie with no money, non-actors and no kind of incident at all, so the end result is testing to say the least. Other than an occasional flashing light, the aliens are kept off screen, with the actors reduced to reciting exposition and reacting to stuff off-screen. As you can imagine, this becomes tiresome very quickly, and with a flagging pace and generally cheap feel, it's really not worth your time.

How can one write a script and produce a movie without one entertaining moment. Film is supposed to be visual in nature and this has people sitting around talking the whole time. And it's no "My Dinner with Andre." Something is killing the people of earth. It's spreading. Some people, trapped in some pretty cold environs (Canada?) are left to try to figure it out. That's all they ever do. Try to figure it out. They have no plan. They have no vitality. The aliens never confront them, to speak of, and so we don't even know what's going on. The outdoorsy scientist has a theory, but it could just be a bunch of hooey. The conclusion is about as stupid as anything I've seen in years. How could someone get the money to put together such a snoozer. If you can't compete with the big boys, at least tell a decent story. As with so many of these, there are long treks through the snow and a snowmobile trip that goes for about ten minutes with nothing happening.