I remember this film because of its seemingly-constant run on HBO in the early 80s, although it seems to have faded from public memory at this point. True, it's merely a bloated sitcom with a saccharine story, but there are some humorous moments and it's a fairly innocuous timekiller.

The setup? Brooke Shields plays Kate, a teenage runaway with a "vicious" drug dealer on her tail (this is a PG movie, so he's not too vicious). He recruits her to make a pickup for him, but instead she runs off with his money; he bursts into her apartment while she's locked in the bathroom, and she escapes through the bathroom window wrapped only in a towel, which she loses in her flight. She winds up in a grocery store parking lot, where she hides in the trunk of George Burns's car. Stuck with the fact that he's got a naked teenage girl in his vehicle, he has no choice but to give her shelter. Despite Brooke's initial stubbornness, the expected warmhearted relationship develops and some convoluted hi-jinks play out as Burns tries to hide Brooke in his house without anybody catching on. A pair of nosy yuppies next door, as well as Burns's overly concerned daughter, threaten to expose the secret and blow Kate's cover.

George Burns is just being himself, so if you enjoy him anywhere else, you'll probably enjoy him here. The other actors in the movie have a little trouble playing off him. Brooke Shields is clearly not a juvenile delinquent; she's way too pretty for that, and we never really see her doing anything bad on screen. She has the impossible job of trying to seem as if she'd be mixed up with a sleazy drug dealer, yet appealing enough to make the audience identify with her. Lorraine Gary is also here in another impossible role, this one as George's daughter, frustrated with Burns's odd ways and seemingly anxious to have him declared senile.

A few sequences really work, like a funny bit when Burns has a bunch of his friends over for a card game, and they have to hide Kate from the police and Burns's daughter. Never mind the idea of a group of elderly men hiding a teenage girl from the police. The illogical ways the plot unfolds actually provide a lot of this movie's weird charm, sometimes nothing makes sense. For instance, Burns (in an obvious nod to Gracie) has a deceased wife who used to be part of his vaudeville act, but he also has a male companion who has been institutionalized--and at one point Brooke razzes him for being gay (actually her term is "a fag"; why is it that certain types of hateful slurs are seen as commonplace in films?). Part of the movie's intended emotional payoff comes from Burns and his friend being reunited, and of course Brooke will need a home and a way to stay "in the family", so Burns recruits his hypersensitive daughter to--get this--ADOPT Brooke, whom she never even meets on-screen!

Despite this strangeness, the film is a harmless comedy that will bring a few smiles, especially for fans of George Burns. His endless string of one-liners should satisfy any fan of his dry humor.

On the run from an abusive drug dealer, foster kid Brooke Shields hides out with ex-vaudeville entertainer George Burns. There are little side-plots here and there (the drug dealer tracking Brooke down, George's daughter trying to get her hands on his money, best friend Burl Ives stuck in an institution),but the bulk of the movie centers on the relationship between the sassy teen and the octogenarian. The script is structured pretty much like a play, with the banter going back and forth between the two principles, yet some wonderful bits surface, as when Burns attempts to distract his nosy neighbors from the teenage girl he has in the house, or a terrific sequence where George's poker buddies--Ray Bolger and Keye Luke among them--show up for their usual game and Brooke is displeased ("Too many people come to this house!" she scowls). George is sweet and tender here; say what you will about his shuffle-along acting style, I felt he was really in character and genuinely cared for Shields, who is stiff and self-conscious at first but warms up midway. Some of the dialogue is surprisingly crass (Burns playing tailor and Brooke calling him a 'fag'),but for cynical 1979 it is sunnier and friendlier than most. One of the few major studio movies of this era not to be released to the home-video market in the 1980s and '90s. **1/2 from ****

I've never understood why this movie has not made it to VHS or DVD. Would it be contractual problems, maybe? Carl Ballentine, Key Luke, Burl Ives..never mind the obvious; that all of George Burns needs to be available. Nothing deep, just light and entertaining. Brooke Shields was good, and so was everyone else. I'd like to have Bill's alarm clock too. The car and the pylons, the breaking pencils, the grocery store carry-out boy, and George Burns typical, poised response are the little things that add up to make us keep chuckling. Too many movies aim for "zany" or "wacky" or "hilarious" and fall flat. Sometimes chuckling is all we need. Bring on the DVD.